Saturday, June 16, 2007

"If you can't quench my thirst / What you in my fridge for? / What you wanna live for?"*

If'n you're the slightest bit like me (sorry), you're probly saying something in the 'ol interminable internal monologue like, "What, I have to care about Emeralds now?!" Either that or some existential shite like, "How many Eggos is too many?" Well, firstly, I feel your pain. I think that's what we're doing here. I feel your pain, you feel my pain, we just hop on our keyboards and feel each other up, pain wise. Nextly, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. I just view this as a favour type deal, from Cleveland to me to you.
I think I've finally grown contented with the middle ground. I'm certainly growing fat, so why not fat and contented. I just think that if my head is gonna be pried open any further, it's not gonna be music that does it. Of course, my middle ground is probly someone's tuneless descent into the ninth circle. (I'm not bragging, what the fuck kind of brag would that be? I just understand that Blues Control and Excepter aren't a lot of peoples idea of "pretty melodic.") Still, I think I'm willing to actually dare anyone not to like Emeralds. I have faith in Emeralds, there's something to be found in their haunted expanses. The whole "Andrew Chalk with a beer can pipe** and a four track" vibe is the best argument for staying awake I've heard in a minute, and I'd tell you to jump all over "The Queen of Burbank (Part Two)" but I think 'sall gone. (This is getting ridiculous.) Still, the Hanson joint and "Dirt Weed Diaries (Vol. Two)" on Maim & Disfigure are just as easy to "big up."
Dude-ocracy doesn't work, some shit is just plain better. This is what makes life worth worthing.

Pissed Jeans : Hope For Men : Sub Pop
Blues Control : S/T : Holy Mountain
Burning Star Core : Operator Dead... Post Abandoned : No Quarter
Excepter : Self Destruction : Fusetron
Jerry's Kids : Is this My World? : X-Claim
V/A : Rumble in the Jungle : Soul Jazz
Frank Miller : The Dark Knight Strikes Again : DC

*from The Notorious B.I.G.'s unreleased "Pepsi Freestyle"
**Just break the ring on the opener and use it to poke the holes. You know this.


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